Letter to Richard - 27 January 2014

Dear Richard

I have finished all of my marking of the supplementary exams J  I feel like I spent just about my whole week last week marking L But at least it’s all done!

I did take time out to go and visit teach Sis Audrey and Sis Marie though, and we had really nice visits with both of them. I shared the article “His Grace is Sufficient” from the September 2013 Ensign – what an amazing explanation of how grace works! Using the analogy of a child having piano lessons just makes so much sense J And it generated really nice discussions with both of them, although it was very interesting to see how different parts of the message really touched each of them. And it wasn’t just our great visit, it’s been coming for a while, but Sis Marie came to church this past Sunday :D And it was so great how naturally she just fitted in! I think she’ll come again too J

I also took some time to go and have a meeting at a company called Getsmarter, who offer online blended courses. UCT has partnered with them to offer all sorts of courses, including we’re hoping a full online degree in the next few years. But they’re busy exploring an Excel course specifically geared towards auditors, and I’ll probably be the UCT contact person, and do the quality control on the course. So it was mainly an exploratory meeting, but I’m quite excited J

Then we said goodbye to Elder Burton, who has been really instrumental in turning missionary work around in our ward! He’s been serving in our ward for 6 months, first as a zone leader, but then he actually asked the mission president to move the zone leadership elsewhere in the zone so that he could concentrate on missionary work. And what a difference having “full-time” missionaries has made in our ward again, plus having someone like Elder Burton who just loves the work! He was one of those missionaries that you felt you could really trust to help things move forward. Like with our friends we felt that we could actually trust that he would do his absolute best, and then if they choose not to accept the gospel it really is their choice, and not because the missionaries weren’t doing their absolute best (unfortunately we haven’t had missionaries that we really felt we could trust for a while L) But it was a wonderful experience having him here, and the whole ward really came to love him. He’s also a very humble person, who you can tell just really wants to be righteous. So inspiring! But he’s back home now, and the new missionary came to meet us, and he also seems pretty solid. So hopefully between Elder Burton’s companion that he helped to really train well, and our new missionary things will keep on moving forward! But it’s been a real example to me of how important it is for a ward to trust the missionaries! Don’t ever do anything to lose the trust of the members!!! But I’m sure you’re more along the lines of Elder Burton ;)

We attended a parents meeting at the school last week, where they told us all the things about how the classes work etc. Grade R is hectic! Josh is going to be getting real homework! And really what they’re doing in Grade R now is what we all did in Grade 1. Hectic!

We had a nice braai on Saturday at Uncle Ron’s house, to celebrate his and Mom’s birthdays, and also to spend some time with Shawn and Annie. A really nice afternoon, and it was great to see how our kids played so nicely with Saffie! And then to see how she was so happy to go to Nursery on Sunday because she had some familiar faces J And Cindy phoned us while we were all together to tell us she’s engaged… So interesting times ahead!

I’ve been attending the Elders Quorum the last few weeks to give feedback on the lessons. Leon was giving his first lesson yesterday, which he did really well in. But there were some interesting comments made, mainly by Sam. The lesson was based on the talk “Be Meek and Lowly in Heart” from the October conference, and when they were talking about humility, they were saying that humility isn’t the same as humiliating ourselves, ie telling people all the time that we’re not perfect. It’s about recognising that we have failings, and then doing what we need to to change and repent. Also when talking about meekness they said that if we’re not meek we might ask God to help us sort something out, but we’re actually planning on fixing it ourselves. So we’re not recognising our dependence on Him. Then our faith is vain, because it’s actually pointless. We’re not really expecting Him to help us. Very interesting insights!

And so that’s about it. Caleb has just 1 week left at Aunty Wendy, and this week I’m planning on taking him to the school every day to make sure he’s getting comfortable and familiar. I’m getting things ready for the semester now, although we still have 3 weeks till the students come back, because the calendar is all strange this year (no complaints though J) So exciting and busy times!

Love

Shelly

Letter to Richard - 20 January 2014 (at last!)

Dear Richard

I did SO well last year with writing to you just about every week! And now it’s been practically a month L But it is an indication of how hectic things have been… Veronica was off for 3 weeks over Christmas and New Year, so we were having to do all of the house work, and in my normal time to write to you each week (Monday evening) we were hectically busy doing things like having an ironing marathon, where Andrew and I both ironed for nearly 2 hours! And last Monday we were over to Fish Hoek because Sarah was getting baptised on her 8^th birthday. So although the baptism was finished by 6:00 because it was a Monday, it still meant a late night home. But it was really special to see her getting baptised, and it was great to hear our kids getting all excited about when they get baptised themselves J

After Christmas we had another 2 weeks of holiday before the kids went back to school, and so we did lots of holiday stuff which the kids enjoyed. We also did quite a bit in our garden, and we’ve had some beans and 2 strawberries from what we had planted before. We’re quite enjoying trying to get our garden going J The kids are loving their swimming again this year, and Caleb is doing all the crazy things that the others are doing, like jumping into the pool, and wanting to be taken down to the dolphin. Crazy kid J But it’s great to see his development! And Josh can now swim down to the dolphin without help!

The new year has brought all sorts of changes for the kids. Hannah has moved up to Primary and has changed to a new class at school for the first time, after 18 months in the first class, so she has struggled a bit to settle with all the changes at once, but it will come soon. Joshua is now in the preschool class which has been his best move ever! No tears a single morning, which is mammoth!!! Caleb very quickly decided that he didn’t want to be at Aunty Wendy anymore now that Amy and the other older kids have all moved to the school… He was just getting bored, so we’ve decided to move him to the school from 1 February, instead of waiting to April, because he is just so ready J My work is pretty much the same, except that I’m doing things for the second time round this year for the most part, which definitely makes it a bit easier J

We had Andrew’s cousin, Bernard, staying with us for a couple of weeks. He’s from Joburg, and he was working in Cape Town on a contract. He’s back in Joburg now, finishing his contract from home (he’s a programmer), but they’re busying looking for a place to stay in Cape Town, and the plan is that he, his wife, and 2 sons will move down in February. It was an interesting experience having someone staying with us, but a good one for us, on the whole. And the kids just love Uncle Bernard! He’s also got a son named Joshua Herbert who’s about a year older than our Josh (we didn’t know that when we chose Joshua’s name…) so if they end up in our ward it will be quite hectic having 2 Joshua Herberts in Primary!

The kids have really been enjoying having Andrew back with Mom and Dad. He’s been inviting the kids over to watch movies with him, he comes to swim with them whenever he’s home, and on Sundays we’ve been going there and he’s playing nicely with the kids. The new game with Josh is that they set up the little army guys and then use blocks as ammunition and have a battle… Joshua’s really enjoying it! But it’s just been so amazing seeing how much Andrew is becoming part of the family in a way that he wasn’t when he was at home before J

I don’t know if you remember back in September we had the missionaries helping our friends move? Well the one missionary, Elder Burton, is going home this transfer, and I felt that it would be a good idea if they stopped by and just tried to make contact before he left. Well they did, and they got an appointment, and this evening I went with them to go and have a first appointment/lesson/meeting with the family!! :D It’s interesting to see how missionary work has changed over the years (it’s my first time out with the missionaries in a few years) and I think the current approach that I’m seeing is really great. They worked today on building a relationship of trust, and then spoke a bit about having a gospel message, and the way their lives are blessed by the gospel, left the restoration pamphlet for them to read, and then have another appointment with them for Saturday. It was so great to be involved! I don’t know how far it will go, but for now the mom at least is very open to the gospel message J We also had 2 baptisms for the ward yesterday – the husband and wife of a sister who got baptised a year or so ago. It’s been an interesting journey for them, but they’re now baptised!

I’m busy looking at my journal to see what’s happened over the last month, and it’s amazing how many times I mentioned having a bad night’s sleep! Caleb especially is sleeping pretty badly, and Hannah a bit as well. It’s actually amazing that we’re walking! But we’ve worked out a proper schedule for ourselves in the mornings, and so far we’ve gotten the kids to school on time each morning, even though we’re so tired! Progress, one step at a time J

So that’s the short version of the last month… It’s so great to hear that you’re enjoying your new area. We’re wishing you lots of success J

Love you lots!

Shelly

Our beautiful family!

Letter to Richard - 22 December 2013 (Preparations for Christmas)

Dear Richard

Christmas is upon us! And the last week has been very much filled with preparations for Christmas! It works out quite nicely that we have nearly 2 weeks off after Christmas, because it’s only really then that you get to really relax… But Andrew was off the whole of last week, and we did get to spend some good time together as a family J

Despite a crazy wind for most of the week we’ve been swimming every day (sometimes even twice a day), and we had an indoor picnic the one evening with Colleen and the kids and Mom and Dad. The one day without wind we went to the beach in the early morning, and invited Josh’s one friend (who’s mom is one of the ones I’ve been speaking to about the church). We had a nice day with Connor, and then when his mom fetched him I gave her a Joy to the World DVD. I also gave a pass-along card to the swimming teacher, with her little Christmas gift, and she was quite interested in sending off for the DVD. So more progress there J

On Wednesday I took Josh and Hannah, together with Dane, Emily and their mom, to watch Cinderella, a children’s theatre production. The kids really enjoyed it, and we’ve been trying to make a conscious effort to socialise with people “normally” as well as trying to invite them to anything to do with the church. Melissa and I had good conversation, and we’re just building our relationship more and more.

We seemed to go to the shops so often last week! Little bits here and there constantly, including getting a huge teddy bear on behalf of Amanda and Clint for Sarah. This teddy was so huge that I sat it on the front seat next to me while I was driving home, and it’s body and head sat higher than me (obviously it’s legs were shorter than an adult’s) and half way home I did the seat belt up around it because it kept on falling over onto me! Some people were walking along the side of the road when I was doing the seat belt, and they had a good laugh! I also went shopping on my own (a gift on its own :P) for part of my gift from Andrew. I asked for clothes as part of my present, and he had no idea what to get… So most of my present from him I’ve bought myself… But I can’t wait to wear the dress I bought! Beautiful ;)

Other preparations including spending 2 evenings wrapping presents and 2 other evenings preparing packs of biscuits to give out to people, and then an afternoon driving around delivering them. The kids were all really keen to be pushing the packs of biscuits into post-boxes and stuff ;)

And that’s pretty much my week… The condensed version at least… Crazy busy at times, but on the whole good family time!

I hope you’ve had a wonderful Christmas, and we’re so looking forward to chatting to you!

Love you lots

Shelly

Letter to Richard - 16 December 2013

Dear Richard

So we’re on holiday now J Andrew is also off this week, so we’re all together as a family!

The kids enjoyed their last week at school, with a water slide on 2 days, and face painting and just playing with their friends. I finished off work last week with finishing those manufacturing videos, attending 2 graduations and our year end function. So mostly a fun week, but it is good to think that I don’t have to think about work for 3 weeks now! It was pretty cool though that at one of the graduations Allan Gray (as in the founder and owner of the company Allan Gray) received an honorary doctorate. It was very interesting to hear in his speech that he gave how much his ethics and values have played a part in his success, including having a good marriage relationship. And although people will have temporary success without these values, to have true success you need to be following a Christ-like life!

Joshua’s best friend had his birthday party on Sunday, so because we couldn’t go to it we went over on Saturday afternoon to take him his present, and for the kids to play a bit. I also helped his mom with making the party packs a bit. This is the family that we had the missionaries help move, and we’ve had some good discussions about the gospel. I gave them a copy of the Joy to the World DVD, which she seemed happy to watch. She was also there when I gave the seminary manual and Book of Mormon to one of the other moms, and seeing the word Mormon, she and her husband had been discussing whether or not we were Mormons. And it turns out that her grandmother and aunt were/are members. He had also heard Sister Pam calling into Cape Talk and saying something about the church. So with all of that she was still happy to watch the DVD, she wasn’t rejecting it… So good progress there J Over the holiday we’re going to be doing a few things together, so hopefully we can have a few more good discussions while we’re spending time socially ;)

Andrew finally finished tithing settlement yesterday!!! It will be so great to have him home a bit earlier than 18:00 on a Sunday afternoon! The kids will also be so glad to have him at home! Yesterday I also had to do reverence training for Josh and Hannah when Andrew did get home. They responded to it quite well, so hopefully I can start using this more effectively now, especially with Andrew getting home  a bit earlier in the afternoons.

We’ve been swimming just about every day, and it’s been so great to see how Caleb is just taking off in the water! We’ve got him jumping into the pool, swimming between us and to the wall. We just have to put a bit of pressure on his back to help him actually move forward, because his body isn’t mature enough yet to propel itself forward. But he’s loving it! And Josh and Hannah are like fish! It is so amazing to see their progress summer by summer J

We had one of Andrew’s cousins stay with us for a night last week. He’s got a 3 month contract here in Cape Town, which may turn permanent. So he’s not moving his wife and 2 kids down here until he knows for sure. But we were lucky that he very quickly found a place to stay a 5 minute walk from where he’s working in Pinelands. But him coming did prompt us to finally get the bathroom door sorted out so that we can lock it :P 6 years in the house, and it’s only happened now! We’ve also been married for 9½ years now! It is just phenomenal how quickly time goes past!

Josh gave his second talk in Primary yesterday, which went really well. We also attended the baptism on an 8-year old convert who has been coming to church and been fully participating for ages! And with Cindy coming home the kids were all very excited to see her! Caleb took a while to remember her, but he seems to have it now. Unfortunately he’s not going to remember you at all really L But it won’t take long for you to win him over, I’m sure ;) You’re just such an awesome kind of guy :P

Hope you’re surviving the heat! We’re thinking of you often J

Shelly

Letter to Richard - 11 December 2013

Dear Richard

It was so great to get your Christmas letter this week J And thanks for drawing a picture for the kids – Josh and Hannah ran to come and see the picture when I told them there was one!

The big news this week has been the death of Nelson Mandela last week. I must say that I was quite emotional when I heard the news, and there has been a lot of coverage and discussion around him on the radio and just everywhere I go. I feel honoured and blessed to be a South African and to know that my life is better today because of the efforts of Nelson Mandela and the many that worked with him to make this country what it is. Without them our lives would be very different! It’s also been amazing to see the global attention that his death has received, and to realise how highly the world considered him. There were close to 100 foreign heads of state that came for the memorial service, which is apparently unprecedented! Plus tons of other dignitaries, like 4 previous presidents of the US and 3 previous prime ministers of the UK. So it’s been quite a week to be in South Africa! On Friday we had a memorial service on campus, and that was really nice to be involved in.

On the home front, Andrew passed his course! J I’m so glad to have another module out of the way! Now it’s just 4 semester courses left to do… Getting there!

Caleb didn’t actually have full blow measles – it was probably baby measles, which is very mild. His spots disappeared within a day or two, and now he’s completely better, which is a huge relief J Caleb has also been climbing and getting into everything! He’s been climbing out of his cot at night, and we have now moved him into a bed in his room. So you can imagine what bedtime has been like the last few nights… And when Andrew went home teaching it was really crazy trying to put all 3 kids in bed when one of them refused to stay in his bed! But hopefully once he gets used to it we’ll be in for a better time.

Work is pretty much finished for the year, and I’ve been doing things like working on the manufacturing videos we’ve made, and improving on them, I reviewed an academic paper for a journal (a bit weird that I ended up doing that considering I haven’t had a paper published yet, but it means that I’m getting more exposure to how a paper should look!), and then more planning for next year.

The kids have had so many Christmas parties! We had the ward party, then they had one at school, and we also had one at my work for all the kids. Caleb was still sick when it was my ward party, so I decided to leave him with Aunty Wendy while I took Josh and Hannah, so I ended up having some nice time with the older 2. Dad was attending a conference on campus, so he came to join us during his lunch break, and then afterwards the kids and I walked him back to his venue on the other side of campus. And of course the kids wanted to play around on the plaza and up and down Jammie steps. It was so cool to think that in 15 years or so they will most likely be students there J Josh and Hannah also took part in their first swimming gala on Saturday. Hannah was only willing to do one of her swims,  and although Josh did all 3 of his swims, he had to be coaxed into the pool each time… But I was so proud of them that they took part! And of course they were very keen when it came time to go and get their medals and party packs (more!) for participating!

So things are slowly winding down to the summer holiday. There has been lots of swimming already, and we’ve been making plans to have the kids playing with other kids over the holidays as well, which will help to keep us all busy J

I’m just hoping we get more sleep!

Love you

Shelly

Letter to Richard - 2 December 2013 (countdown to Christmas begins!)

Dear Richard

It’s December already! Really crazy how this year has gone so fast – but then you’ll be feeling that too! I’m hoping that these letters will get to you before Christmas J

My work last week was pretty relaxed… finally J After releasing the results I didn’t have any major complaints from the students, which is always great!

I also finished working on the chapters for the new groups textbook we’ve been working on. It was a bit frustrating because I did the last chapter the one day, but then I lost all the work! L So the next day I spent another 4 hours redoing it… But I’m pretty sure that there were areas that I made changes the second time round that I missed the first time, so maybe it wasn’t all bad… J But I did learn some lessons – firstly to know where you’ve been saving your work! And then also just listen and act on every thought that comes to mind that sounds like a good idea! There were a few thoughts I had during the day that could have prevented me from re-doing the work, but I didn’t listen properly L But now I know better!

I attended a meeting for all the lecturers in my section of the department, the Financial Reporting section. I was able to present some of the proposals I have for changes to my course for next year, which I had already discussed with the powers that be. And again the feedback was positive. But what was also really nice was that one of the first year lecturers that I’ve worked with for the first time this year then told everyone how much she’s enjoyed working with me this year and how much help I gave with some aspects of the first year courses. It was really nice to have such positive comments J and completely unasked for! But that was 3 meetings in the last 2 weeks where things went really well for me, and I think that I’m starting to finally find my really valuable place in the College J I also got some nice feedback on the marks spreadsheet that I worked on developing from another lecturer that always used to be the excel go-to-guy, and parts of that has now been rolled out to other departments in the faculty as well!

I sleep-walked for the first time ever last week! Andrew says that I regularly talk in my sleep, but this was a first… Strangely enough, I think it’s because I’m so tired all the time that these things are happening… But I’ve realised that I need to go back to taking iron. In fact, we were fasting for missionary work this weekend, and lately I’ve been feeling so tired and weary that I actually haven’t had the energy to talk to anyone about the church, and in fact I haven’t wanted to have the church come up, because I didn’t have the energy to give a discussion justice… But during the fast I was talking to mom, and it got around to my tiredness, and I realised that I’ve stopped taking iron, and I need to go back to it… And I realised that there is quite possibly part of the answer to me being more effective with missionary work again! So I bought some more iron tablets this morning ;)

I went and had my ears syringed last week, because they had gotten so blocked that I couldn’t hear properly at all! It was so amazing to get my hearing back again! It’s been interesting though, having to learn to tune out background noise again… I’ve heard that deaf people who get hearing aids struggle at first to filter out the background noise, and I felt like to a degree I’m having the same problem. When I’m at the shops I struggle to hear people talking, because the music is so loud in my ears… But I know that I’ll adjust again, and at least I don’t have a permanent problem! Once again - our bodies are wonderful!

This is the worst time of year for a bishop and his family… Tithing settlement really takes it out of him, and it’s a very lonely time for us… There have been a few times recently that I’ve had the kids (who are also sick L) crying because they miss him L. It really is tough… But just 2 more weeks and then his report has to be in, so then we get him back! And then it will be the holiday, and he’s taking more leave this year than in the past, so it really is going to be great!

And yes, these sick kids… All of us had a nasty virus, although the kids had it worse than us, and Caleb the worst of all. And now it’s developed into measles for Caleb! I had kept him home from church yesterday because of how he was, and when he came out in the rash today I was so glad I did! Also I was glad to be at home when he puked all over me… That would have been nasty at the chapel! So we’ve got a very sad and sick boy L But hopefully he’ll sleep okay tonight!

So I couldn’t visit anyone’s class yesterday to give feedback, but I found a really great article in the August 2013 Ensign that I sent to all of the teachers in the ward. “Great questions, great discussions”. Definitely well worth a read! (If you don’t have access to the Ensign let me know and I’ll send it to you. It shows in a great way how to use questions that will promote good gospel discussions, and what kind of questions not to use as well! It was amazing reading the article and feeling like this author can read my mind! But he could put my thoughts into words a whole lot better than I could have! I’m a really strong believer in using questions!

We had a braai at Colleen and Rohan’s place for Andrew’s birthday on Friday. It was nice to see that Josh and Hannah are getting so much better behaved if we’re at someone’s house. There’s hope!

We worked in the garden a bit again on Saturday, and I also sprayed the lawn and cut back the lavender this evening while the sun set beautifully. This weekend we planted some flower seeds, and some of the vegetables we planted last week are coming up already! We’ll still have to see how they grow all the way up, but that’s very promising! J

On Saturday afternoon we had the ward Christmas party. The kids really enjoyed it, and Father Christmas got fantastic presents for Josh and Hannah especially – they haven’t stopped playing with them! Josh got a dinosaur where the skeleton can come out of its rubbery skin, and Hannah got a Dora the Explorer Mega Blocks set. There’s a really cool toy factory shop where Father Christmas got the toys at great prices! It was really nice as well though that a less-active couple where I visit teach the wife came to the party! We’ll get them back at church yet J And there were a few less active families and individuals that came. It worked out well!

So now we really start the countdown to Christmas, and it’s going to be so awesome getting to speak to you! Looking forward to it!

Keep well, love you lots J

Shelly